Part 6: Lost in Condo City

After our exciting morning at the Royal Gorge, the Weenie family arrived in Pagosa Springs, which would be home base for the next week. Our condo was perfectly located in close proximity to some of southern Colorado’s most beautiful hiking. That said, our first full day in Pagosa was spent sleeping. Literally. We slept until noon-ish, ate, napped, napped again, had dinner and went to bed around 8:30.

The real adventure in Pagosa Springs began the next day, when Dexter and I set out on our first hike. The weather was a bit cloudy and cool as we went outside to explore the neighborhood. After winding our way through the area, we came upon a quaint gravel path leading to yet another set of condos. Beyond that there was a small beaver pond I was hoping to reach before the weather turned.

About a minute later when the skies opened, Dexter and I decided to head back home. Now, I’m not known for my keen sense of direction, so it’s generally a good idea to assume my internal compass points the opposite way from where you’d want to go. Bearing that in mind, I had three choices: (1) Go the way I thought we should go; (2) Go the opposite way from where I thought we should go; or (3) Walk in circles until someone found us.

Having opted for the latter, Dexter and I set off in a circular fashion as gigantic taunting crows took our lead and circled overhead. While these asshole harbingers of doom mocked us from above—all the while hoping my small, leashed, rodent-like companion would make a break for it—I spotted a figure walking toward us.

This being a retirement community, the fit-looking man walking across the street appeared to be somewhere in his mid-seventies. While I donned a sweater, heavy pants, fleece pullover, ski jacket, gloves, scarf and a hat; this fellow was strolling around in jeans and a light windbreaker. When I flagged him down to ask where I was, he happily offered to show me the way home.

As I removed my glasses to wipe off the rain, I told our new friend that I thought the condo was brown and near some aspen trees. After replacing my specs, I realized that every condo as far as the eye could see was brown and surrounded by aspens. Within 15 minutes of searching I was out of breath, sweating and mumbling incoherently, so just to stave off further embarrassment I lied and said we had indeed located the right place. Then I walked up to the front door of some random stranger’s home.

While I wistfully watched my trailblazing friend fade into the distance, I suddenly remembered I was carrying a phone that could do everything but clean the toilet. I looked up our address, but unfortunately my iPhone was unable to smack me across the face and tell me that the condo was right behind us. Dexter and I ended up wandering around the parking lot in the rain for another 20 minutes before finally finding our way home.

Tune in next time for Part 7 in the Travelin’ Weenie series.

Catch up with the rest of the saga…
Part 1: Travelin’ Weenies – The Colorado Experiment
Part 2: The Comfort of Crap
Part 3: Weenie in Her Full, Upright and Locked Position
Part 4: And they’re off…
Part 5: Down in the Valley